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our 5 cents
Friday, December 23, 2005
  comments, and maybe a bit of muffin
well it's been a while, but alas here i am. instead of commenting on each individual post, i will summarize my thoughts and feelings in the form of a real entry for you to peruse.

you all are well aware that i am not as enamoured by the feline pet as the rest of you. indeed, really, really not in love with them in the least. all of you with your meowing buddies, well i just don't share the glee. i know this is a 4-1 loss that i suffer here with all you pussy-fans, and thus i just don't fit in. i am in the minority the world over. fret not... in general i can handle it. with these feelings i was left last week to look at ms. ms.'s "stuff on my cat" post. now this may get you all into calling me the kitty-grinch, but i dunno, those cats did nothing for me. ba-humbug. i tried to go to the website in order to melt the frozen cat-corner of my heart, but to no avail. ok, it was just plain weird. i am bracing myself for the backlash that may ensue from this comment, i am. it's me against the world on this one, and i am prepared.

(lovely ms. ms., the above comment in no way is meant to offend you as the poster of such catity. i love you and your posts... see below if you aare doubting me.)

rescued was the cat post by an insanely funny entry on the holiday season. and the cookies consumed here-in. you know, to us jews who don't rock around the christmas tree, it really is all about the chocolate and crumbly sweet-things. ms. ms., i laughed and laughed, mostly because you found it necessary to post a LIST of what junk food you had consumed. the recap was sooo useful, as it made me feel like i was right there with you, sharing in the caloric fattiness of it all, piece by delicious piece. cookies and molten sweet stuff abound! hurray for the holidays! (now playing at my house: everyone's favorite chocolate chunk cookies and tiny brownies.)

it has come to the time to congratulate hicky on her purchase. it was i who was with you when the fine-slippers-of-leathery-delight were placed on your twinkly toes. you were like cinderella when prince charming came a-knocking. they fit just right, they were meant for you, oh princess. it warmed my cockles to read of your obvious joy in finally making their purchase. to you my friend, one of the gorgeously adorned feet, i say enjoi. (and i sure hope you wear them lots, there is no need to "save" such wonderful accoutrements, as living life to its fullest is the most special occasion of all!)

guess what, guys? i'm going to california too! and guess what also? my work is sending me! in february! the month after hick is there, and the month before ms. is there! can you believe it? what a coincidence? what are the chances? well that's an easy question to answer: none. because i'm a liar. maybe you have to be a cat lover in order to go to california... i have no fear, though. we will get our act together and descend on tali like a hungry school of vultures, and make her wish that she had never complained about us not visiting. you'll get what you have coming to you tali, oh you will little miss. in the form of three crazy chicks who will make you laugh till you pee (and/or barf).

(for the record, i know it's not a "school" of vultures. no, i know thats for fish. nor is it a "pack" of vultures, bcause that's for wolves... i was just unable to find the right word.)

this brings us to the "bit of muffin" portion of the blog. hick and i have this routine. we go to starbucks, we get mezzo-non-fat-lattes and muffins (she a raspberry, i a corn). we sit, we chat, we laugh, we spit partially chewn muffin. *correction* i spit partially chewn muffin. i think that no one ever told me not to talk with my mouth full, because every time, yes, EACH AND EVERY TIME, we partake in this ritual, i manage to spit muffin at hick. i think that i spit muffin even when i am NOT talking with my mouth full. i have tried to control it, but it seems that i can't! i obviously have a problem. now before you guys get all "well you are biting off more that you can chew" on me, i have to tell you that i am not a big biter. we are talking small bite-lets here. hick, i know it's gross, and that maybe you will want to put an end to this routine or ours due to its grossity. i understand. you have to draw the line when that little bit of muffin makes a perfect arc from my mouth directly into your treasured latte.

(in final news, i hear it's someone's birthday on monday, but i'm not saying who's.)
 
Comments:
this is freakin hilarious. all of it. i am going to read it again later and comment afresh.
 
Oh OOTG, the muffin bit has already made that perfect arc... right into my heart.

Also - I wore the foot adornemnts of delight last night and though they made my toes dance and my eyes open wider in awe - they began to leave impressions on me - the kind I don't want! I had to remove the Cinderella slippers due to the growing malaise in the side-of-the-smallest metatarsal region. O, agony! O, betrayal!

O, leather that will hopefully soften over time!
 
One more thing,

Though I agree wholeheartedly with Ms.Ms's observation of the posts' hilarity (it really was), I feel it is my duty to inform the rest of Our Five Cents' about OOTG miserly grinch-like attitude toward sharing her cookies.
Due to my famish-ment before dinner at her place the other day. I requested the presence of a cookie in my mouth and was told that I would "ruin my appetite". Clearly, the 12 years of learning about each other has haught OOTG ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about me... I was finally granted the cookie, and ate it under the skeptical watch of OOTG.
Needless to say, I ate very well despite this appetizer.
After the meal, I requested another cookie, to "round out" the dining experience. I would like to point out that OOTG had a tin containing about 100-150 cookies). She said to me "if you want more, come to my birthday party". (Yes, the birthday she mentioned at the end of her blog was her own).

I couldn't believe my ears. Are you serious? I questioned. I thought you were full! She answered. (Hospitality I tell you! Sheesh!) Well, that was 10 mins ago, I'm ok now.... long pause....
"Well, FINE! Have another cookie if you want it!"
She yelled at me.

Now I ask you - coming from someone who clearly loves the sugary delights that are brought forth around the holiday season - why would she be this cruel? WHY?

I did take the cookie, and I ate it too, but it was not, and shall never have the chance again to be, savoured.

Along with my tri-chocolate chips (dark, milk, white -invented by MsMs's uncle!) I got a whack of hum-bug and guilt.
 
not only do i hate cats, spit in others' beverages, but i am a cookie miser. i'm afgraid that hick's tale is true, detailing acurately and precicely the biotch that i am. another fault exposed here on the blog. i feel naked. (maybe because i am.)
oh ya, who's comin' to the party on monday? there will be cookies a-plenty.
and it brings me sorrow to hear about the faulty footwear fiasco! i feel great saddness for you, my friend. yes, the leather shall loosen, and yes, the sun shall shine on your feet!
 
will there be....brownies... at the party?
 
i have taken a break from cleaning up hick's pool of drool that she has left on the blog to say that yes, of COURSE there will be brownies. what's a party without brownies?
 
Are those brownies? I want to come to OOTG's party too! Me too, me too!! .. you would think I was all cookied out by now- but NO! I'm still eatin' em!
 
I'm here I'm here I'm here.
I'm in town ladies..until Jan.1....
who's around? when are we hanging out? TELL ME EVERYTHING!
 
Please note the time Tali entered that comment - did you look?
I think she takes the cake of blogging - but not hte brownies - those are for ME tali - you hear? ME!

I'm off to the big O of ttawa for 3 days, sorreh T. I'll call when I get backka.
 
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Previously on Our 5 Cents
I'M COMING TO CALIFORNIA, BABY!
My New Love
We Interrupt this Lack of Blogging to Broadcast an...
Stuff on my Cat
Hang on to your bootstraps
Lord Love a Duck
medical news
Vomit By Ms.Ms. and Hickteeth (Circa 1992)
What the @$#& Was Wrong With Us?
OOTG's questions

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