Split Me Trousers!
This morning, I pressed the remote control button to turn on CityTV and plopped down on my couch. I heard a very distinct "RIIIIIIP"-ing sound and thought... was that the couch pillow? I stood, touching delicately along my backside, and yes sir, that sound was the sound of my pyjama pants tearing evenly and completely down the rear. My ass crack was exposed. I can wear the pants no longer.
So, this is a tribute to my most favourite pair of Urban Outfitter's pyjama pants, their drawstring at the side, their light weight and soft cotton, their stripes of shades of brown and blue, pants that have been around the world.... how I will miss them.
In addition, this is a tribute to my ass, which I thought fit into those pyjama pants perfectly. I wasn't the one eating all the desserts at the OOTG's house on Passover! My ass should not be one to rip pants! But, my bum, in all its glory, is capable of such things. And for this, I commend it.