An Occasion of Massive Proportions Eek! I feel the girlish glee bubbling up inside me, ready to spill over the brim, spew and fester and consume my being.... it is the excitement only a large penis greater or equal to the 95th percentile of all the penises in the world (sorry that is pediatric growth chart speak, but it works).

You'll never guess what happened... no, I did not have sex with it.

But... the proud bearer of said penis (aka: The Hulking Shaft of Enormity). Called me tonight after a 1 month hiatus. Only, I didn't think it was a hiatus, I just thought neither of us could care less to see the other again.

So... a call. A booty call? I hope so, cause I sure do need one.

But if so, it was to no avail. I got the Mrs. Ms. Ms (aka: my mother) couch surfing here all weekend. I couldn't even find out what his Royal Massiveness wanted. What a cruel, cruel world.  Ms. M ¶ 11:29 PM