So you wanna know what's up with me, eh? Alright Ms. Ms. I get your message. I don't post enough. Point taken. And here I am. I warn you, though, that this may not be the interesting and entertaining post you are looking for to spice up your day. But you asked for it, so now we will all have to grin and bear it. (I see y'all forcing your smiles. I SEE YOU. Stop it, you are making me feel stupid. Which I am, so I guess there isn't much wrong with that.)

So let's see... what's fun and new and exciting in the world of One of the Girls? Hmmm...

This weekend I had a trade show. I feel like I am prostituting my work to people when I do trade shows. It makes me so cranky. Hickteeth came to help out/keep me from committing suicide on Sunday morning. She was a doll for doing so (WHERE WERE THE REST OF YOU?), and she can attest to the foulness of my mood. Ugh, two days in a gross, stiff convention hall with no fesh air or natural light.

Adding to the foul mood was the fight I got into with a cab driver who was taking me to said pain in the ass show early Sunday morning. I really don't know what the fuck was with him. He was about to take me like 8 blocks out of the way. Me: "WHY ARE YOU TURNING HERE? STOP THE METER NOW!" And so he did. A little agression goes a long way.

A highlight of the show was the arrival of Hickteeth's sister, and her teeny nephew, who we shall name Noteeth. Man he is like the cutest baby on the face of this earth. So freaking delicious. I can totally eat him up. I'll take 2 Noteeths, a side of fries and a Diet Coke, to go.

What else is new... Oh yes! You remeber the medication I was taking when we were sojourning in Vegas? I was taking 2 pills a day at that time, up from one pill a day the week before. Apparently the medical professionals advise increasin the dosage bit by bit, week by week. To avois, you know, the side effects. I remember stressing one particular side effect that was plaguing me: the runs from the anus. When that resolved itself I increased to three pills a day. The wonderous side effects have returned. Along with some gas, and much loud noise-making from my belly. Hopefully all will subside soon. God help me if the doctor increases the dosage to 4 or even 5 pills a day (as I just read about someone taking. Holy shit! Pun totally intended.)

Not much going on on the sex front. I don't think The C and I have done it in over a week. I think that is a record in the past few months. 2006 has really been a year of fucking in our household. We have been having a blast in the bedroom. And living room, and kitchen, and basement, and who wants to come over now and sit on our furniture and eat at our kitchen table? We bought a trusty new sex toy and have been enjoying the plesures it is unlocking in both of us. Ladies, it is not true that sex dies after marriage. We have been experiencing one HOT year. My advice: keep it spicy, play with grown-up toys!

The past two weeks have been riddled with illness for me. First it was a runny nose, sneeze attacking, chill riddled ball of wax. This was followed by the emergence of the recurring cyst on my cocyx that hurts like a motherfucker. Both have cleared up wonderfully, thanks to my homeopath. She is a wonderful lady that cures all that ails me (in record time), without making me pop antibiotics. Extraordinary indeed.

This my friends brings to a close the update that was requested of me. Funny, perhaps not. Informative, for certain. Keep your updates a-comin'. I love tales of Ms. Ms's boyfirends ball trimming, and cryptic discussions on marriage. I miss you all with a terrible heavy heart. I am so glad that I have to in my life.

Hey Shennanigans- where's our video?  one of the girls ¶ 5:20 PM